Today I listened to a song by Emeli Sande (for those of you who have
yet to hear this artist, seriously, you are missing out big time)
that have a title asimilar to "This is how I love". I listened to the
song about the artist singing about how uninteresting she really is,
that she won't be able to afford flowers and vacations and expensive
sweet nothings, that she doesn't know how to make the person she love
laughed or able to have nothing but passion for the person who cared
for... yet she knows that her heart only beat for the one she love.
When I first listened to the song, I didn't think much of it, just another beautiful voice in a sea of love song.. but as I listened deeper into the lyrics, I can whole heartedly felt the angst that I sometimes feel in a relationship. I had been in several failed relationships and the longest I ever encountered love was for 4 years, which, in all aspect is a very bad track record. However, when I do love someone, I love the person with all my heart. I won't be able to give them expensive cars of jewelleries or even be there 24/7 at their beck and call. But when they really need me, I will appear and when they wanted space, I will give it to them. I don't love with passion where I can only display such passion in bed and give them insatiable love making. (I am extremely easily satisfied lol). However, I shall show my love with affection and care and understanding and attention to details. That, in so many ways, are considered "boring". However, in times of need, isn't that what we all really wanted?
I had lost a couple of big loves to other people. They either find
someone younger, or more energetic or richer and prettier... those
relationships they had after me never really lasted and eventually they
will come back to me yearning for the attention and care and somewhat
cooled love. Yet, in those time of their return, I no longer welcome
them with open arms and certainly not with the affection they so keen to
seek. I can be hurt too, during the time when my heart felt like it
only beat for the one I loved and have that jerked out due to something
as mundane as age, I will be absolutely devastated. And devastation does
what it does, it creates a scar that never really heal.
I now no longer loved like when I was younger. When I do look for someone, god forbid the person will end up being the "one". I no longer display the animalistic passion that I once held so important. I now love with responsibility, with kindness, with attention and always, always with my heart fully belong to that one person... it might be boring, it might be silly.. but this is how I love.
K
When I first listened to the song, I didn't think much of it, just another beautiful voice in a sea of love song.. but as I listened deeper into the lyrics, I can whole heartedly felt the angst that I sometimes feel in a relationship. I had been in several failed relationships and the longest I ever encountered love was for 4 years, which, in all aspect is a very bad track record. However, when I do love someone, I love the person with all my heart. I won't be able to give them expensive cars of jewelleries or even be there 24/7 at their beck and call. But when they really need me, I will appear and when they wanted space, I will give it to them. I don't love with passion where I can only display such passion in bed and give them insatiable love making. (I am extremely easily satisfied lol). However, I shall show my love with affection and care and understanding and attention to details. That, in so many ways, are considered "boring". However, in times of need, isn't that what we all really wanted?
I had lost a couple of big loves to other people. They either find
someone younger, or more energetic or richer and prettier... those
relationships they had after me never really lasted and eventually they
will come back to me yearning for the attention and care and somewhat
cooled love. Yet, in those time of their return, I no longer welcome
them with open arms and certainly not with the affection they so keen to
seek. I can be hurt too, during the time when my heart felt like it
only beat for the one I loved and have that jerked out due to something
as mundane as age, I will be absolutely devastated. And devastation does
what it does, it creates a scar that never really heal. I now no longer loved like when I was younger. When I do look for someone, god forbid the person will end up being the "one". I no longer display the animalistic passion that I once held so important. I now love with responsibility, with kindness, with attention and always, always with my heart fully belong to that one person... it might be boring, it might be silly.. but this is how I love.
K
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